Q. How can you tell if your cow is dyslexic?... A. She goes around telling all the other cows that Hindus are sacred.

Q. Where does evaporated milk come from?..... A. Thirsty cows.

Q. How can you tell if your cow has a substance abuse problem?.... A. If she starts smoking her grass instead of eating it.

Q. Why is the MOOn made of green cheese?... A. Because the grass up there makes for bad milk.

A bunch of cows and bulls were standing in a field. A huge gust of wind came along and all the cows fell over, but the bulls just stood there, bracing themselves against the gale. So all the cows stood up and brushed themselves off and went back to their business. Pretty soon, a tornado blew through and all the cows were knocked to the ground again, and yet again, the bulls just continued munching on grass. The third time, a hurricane blew through and all the cows were knocked into the next pasture. The bulls just said "moo." Finally one of the cows walked up to one of the bulls and said, "Moo. What's the Mooing deal? How come the wind always knocks us for a big Mooing loop while you just stand there unharmed?" The bull replied, "Moo. Isn't it obvious? We bulls wobble, but we don't fall down."

More from our friend Raquel:

Q:What is a cow's favorite love song? A: It had to be Moo.

Q: How do cow's pay for things? A: With Moolah.

Q: What classical composer is a cow's favorite? A: Moozart

Q: What if cows were like butterflys? A: The larval form of an udderfly is called a cattlepillar and the pupal form is a cowcoon.

Q: Instead of "Dark Side of the Moon" by the music group Pink Floyd... A: Cows prefer "Dark side of the Moo" by Oink Floyd

Q: How do cows blend in with the environment? A: Cowmooflauge